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A client at my Tuesday coffee group roasted my follow-up email in front of 8 people
So I go to this small business coffee meetup every Tuesday at a diner in Bakersfield, mostly just to get out of the house and swap stories. Last month a guy named Roy, who runs a small landscaping company, read my follow-up email out loud to the whole table because I had sent it to him as an example. It was 3 paragraphs long, had a "just circling back" opener, and basically said nothing. Everyone laughed, and one lady said it sounded like a bill collector trying too hard to be nice. I sat there for a second feeling dumb, then pulled out my phone and rewrote it right there at the table. New version was 4 lines: one line reminding him what we talked about, one line with the price, one line asking if Tuesday or Thursday worked, and my name. Roy replied to that one in 11 minutes. Now I write every follow-up under 75 words and I read them out loud before hitting send, because if it sounds weird in my own mouth it probably sounds weird to them too. Anyone else got a short follow-up that closes, or do you go longer and it still works?
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oliver_baker4916m ago
You said Roy replied in 11 minutes, so did the short one actually close the deal or just get a reply?
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